We have been able to talk about a variety of different topics throughout the course of this class and I was able to learn a ton of new stuff. This past week’s discussion was no exception to that. We have talked about preparing for marriage, transitioning into married life, and the many aspects of marriage and preparing for one. This week, we talked about something much more intimate and sacred – Sexual Intimacy and Family Life.

            We have discussed and I have posted on this blog before about how men and women are just undeniably and biologically different. We have different ways of thinking and different ways of responding or dealing to and with situations. Our bodies work differently which means we have different strengths that can assist us greatly with our roles in life. The topic of intimacy in a marriage just strengthens my thoughts and appreciation for those differences and I feel like it is very important for anyone to know of these differences and how they can affect us sexually.

            We were able to talk about and learn how men and women experience and respond to sex. There are four stages of sexual response: Excitement, plateau, orgasm, and finally resolution. Excitement is a result of physical or psychological arousal. Men and women go through different physical changes during this stage like the lubrication of the vagina in women and the erection of the penis in men. This may or may not lead to the next stage, which is plateau. This is when two people engage in sexual activity in preparation for orgasm, which is the third stage. This is the stage when there is a release of all the sexual tension and excitement that has been building up till this point. In men, for example, this is when ejaculation of the semen happens. Lastly, there is resolution, which is a sort of “resting” phase for the body. Men tend to need a much longer time of resolution than women do, as women can have multiple orgasms, sometimes without the need of this resolution phase.

            On top of the physical changes that happen which we can visualize, there are also hormonal changes in men and women’s bodies. Men have testosterone which leads to an increased sex drive and desire, often times more than that of women. Women, on the other hand, have a plethora of different releases of hormones. One of the hormones which will affect women the most is oxytocin. Oxytocin is released when a mother is going into labor. It helps with contractions of the uterus in preparation for delivering a baby. This hormone also makes women incredibly emotionally attached to the baby she just delivered to.

            This presents challenges as women who engage in sexual activity before they get married will experience this surge of oxytocin in their system. They may not be aware of it, but it makes them very attached to whoever their sexual partner is, which may be damaging emotionally as she will get attached but if it is just a hook-up and not an actual and real relationship, she may find it hard to let go and may feel like she is ripped away from him/her. Men, on the other hand, may engage in sexual activity before marriage and just move on a lot easier, which is why men tend to have more sexual partners than women do.

             One thing to remember is that sex may be a very instinctive and human thing to do, but it is also very sacred and powerful. If used correctly and properly, sexual intimacy in marriage has the ability to strengthen, bond, and make a couple feel like one, not just emotionally but physically. Married couples must always be aware of their spouses and be sure that they are treating them with love, respect, but also knowing and meeting their needs. Couples need to also be kind and generous with each other, not withholding love or intimacy with each other.